Faith Like a Child

I am so thankful for Anna. Her innocence and excitement makes me smile. It is so refreshing and humbling at the same time.

On Friday we were reading a story in school about a missionary Lady in China who had all of her money stolen. She didn't have any food left and now she didn't have any money to buy anything. Anna was pretty concerned about what would happen, so we read on (she doesn't like cliffhangers any more than I do! :) ). The missionary got down on her knees before the Lord and asked Him to provide (not because she was starving but because she wanted her housekeeper to see the Lord's power). Within 10 minutes she had 4 different people show up at her door. One brought bread, another eggs, on brought fruit, and lastly someone brought coffee. The story went on to tell how God provided all the money that this lady needed for a conference they were having (and He provided it the very day she needed it).

Anna took all of this in, her eyes lit up and she had a huge smile on her face when the story was finished. She was totally blown away by how God had provided for every one of the Missionary's needs. I then told her about a time when I was in collage and someone had stolen my money ($500 to be exact). I didn't know what I was going to do. But, amazingly God provided. As I thought about it I realized that I have SOOOO many stores like this that I can share with my children. There was the time I went on a mission trip to PNG for the summer. I knew that when I returned I would not have the money to pay for my next semester in school. I wasn't able to work and save money because I had spent my break in another country. I had no idea how it was going to work out but I trusted the Lord that He knew. As it turned out I had raised so much support that there was enough left over to pay for my entire semester back at NTBI. WOW! That just blows my mind. Again just another example of God's faithfulness.

Anyway, Anna listened to all of this with great interest. The wheels in her head must have been turning! :) Much later that day the kids and I met a friend at McDonald's for a play date/mom coffee time. The kids played in the tunnels and my friend and I visited over coffee. Suddenly Anna comes running over to me,
"Mom, I have to tell you something. You know how we talked today about God answering prayers? Well, I prayed right now that I wouldn't get shocked going down the slide. Guess what? I didn't get shocked!!!"

She was so excited. I have always explained to her that God isn't like a magic Genie, just because you pray it doesn't mean that God will answer the way you want. I reminded her of this, but also added, "isn't it cool that God did do that for you?" (Sounds funny but she hates getting shocked.) She could barely contain her joy, she couldn't wait to tell dad when we got home.

Maybe this all seems like a silly example but I was humbled by the experience. To see her joy, her excitement, her thankfulness, her simple faith...

And He called a child to Himself and set him before them, and said, "Truly I say to you, unless you are converted and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven.
"Whoever then humbles himself as this child, he is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Matt. 18:2-4

Jesus spoke of having faith like a child. Our conversion is characterized by this kind of faith, "Like the Beatitudes, it pictures faith as the simple, helpless, trusting dependence of those who have no resources of their own. Like children they have no achievements and no accomplishments to offer or commend themselves with."(John MAcarthur) The christian life requires that same faith. Complete trust in our Father. Simply taking His hand and believing His Word as truth. Believing that He is faithful because His Word says He is, and He has always proven Himself to be.

I am so thankful for my precious daughter. Her simple faith has humbled me and spoken to my heart.

Father, help me not to forget and not to be so "grown up" that I make things complicated.

I long to be like a child again...

During the Storm

I watched this video last night called "Rain" by Rob Bell. It really touched me. I love the picture of my Heavenly Father Holding me securely in His arms during a storm. If you ever get a chance to watch it you should! It is beautiful!! I think God knew I needed to see that last night.

Needing to refocus

Shout joyfully to the LORD, all the earth.

Serve the LORD with gladness;

Come before Him with joyful singing.

Know that the LORD Himself is God;

It is He who has made us, and not we ourselves;

We are His people and the sheep of His pasture.

Enter His gates with thanksgiving

And His courts with praise

Give thanks to Him, bless His name.

For the LORD is good;

His lovingkindness is everlasting

And His faithfulness to all generations.

Psalm 100

This morning during my quite time I was reading through the Psalms. I was so struck with how many times during my reading that David referred to Joy(not just this psalm but I also read a few others). Maybe it's because God has been impressing on me the need to have joy in my life. I need to have joy in all I do and in every situation. We are to consider it joy even when we go through trials.

I have been struggling lately with finding joy in my trials. I tend to want to feel sorry for myself. something happened last night that brought me to tears and made me come before the Lord. It actually sounds kind of funny but I couldn't get my keys in my car out of the ignition. They were stuck while the car was running; meaning we couldn't get the car to turn off. Bill and I tried for an hour before Bill had to just unplug something in the engine (I have no idea what) to get the car to stop. A friend of mine had called while we were in the middle of all of this and I had asked her to pray. Well, she called back later to find out what we had figured out with the car. I explained what Bill did and that we were going to have to take it to the car shop in the morning. I was feeling very stressed about this because it means spending more money, when things are starting to feel tight. I then heard myself say to her, "I guess God wants to keep us humble and keep us poor." I kind of laughed and we moved on with our conversation.

When I hung up the phone it suddenly struck me how bitter my words had been. Oh, they did not sound bitter but they had not be said with any spiritual meaning or with humility...I was feeling angry and bitter about our circumstance. And what's worse is, I said it to my friend sadly with maybe the intention to get her to feel bad for me. Sometimes I am just so disgusted by my sin! I sat there and cried and prayed. I asked God to help me have joy and to have faith in Him. I have been fearful because Bill is going to be graduating this spring and he has to find a job. He has been looking and applying and not really hearing a whole lot in return. My flesh is scared that he won't find something; but then on the other hand if he does find a job I am afraid we will have to move far away from all that we love here. My head knowledge tells me that God is in control and that I need to rest in Him. I have to keep coming before the Father and confessing my lack of faith in Him. God is so faithful even though my faith is so small. It's just been such a struggle for me to surrender what I want and say, "What ever Your will is I will accept it."

I am being honest here. I do feel discouraged. I feel "alone". I don't really feel like any of my friends understands (please understand I am just venting here...I am not upset with anyone). I know that I have people that love me and are praying for me. Everyone has their own hardships and struggles so why should mine be any different? And, even though I am hurting right now I don't want to be ignorant of the hurt that is going on around me. I want to be there for my friends. But I guess that's hard to do when my focus is so much on myself and my circumstances. My focus needs to be on Christ.

I know that when I feel "alone" that is usually God's clue to me that I need to come to Him. He is there...He is there always. Even when no one else understands...He does. Oh, how I need Him!

Thank you God, for your lovingkindness. Thank you that you are faithful even though I am faithless oftentimes. I am so glad that you are in control and not me. Please help me to be surrendered to whatever Your will is. Thank you God for your provision for our family and that we have never been without anything we need. You are amazing Lord. You have always pulled through for us even when it was at the last minute and I doubted you. Father, help me to keep my eyes on you. Help me to remember that you love me and have my best interest in mind, even though I cannot understand. Help me to remember that trials are a gift and they bring about perseverance and faith. Help me to lay my burden at your feet and rest in you.

In Jesus name, Amen

Flowers from a friend

For my birthday my friend Janel got me punch card to a local florist. I get to go in every month for a year and get a small bouquet of flowers. This was for Feb, which I picked up on the last day of the month! :) I think they are beautiful!!! What a fun gift! Thanks Janel...I love it!